Whenever we went to the family reunion, we would all eat and then play. Before there was a park at our reunion site, we used our imaginations to play or we would climb the chin-up bars that were taller than all of us. (We used to be flexible and strong) At some point, someone would score $5 from their parent and we would venture out on a canoe or paddleboat and if you rode with one cousin, we were inevitably dumped into the water because the canoe would be tipped over. Even though I would only get to see some of these cousins twice a year, we were friends and always comfortable with each other.
This last weekend, labor day came and went. It was my turn to bring my own kids to the family reunion. This is what I noticed: Many of the kids were already paired off with other cousins. My kids didn't really have anyone to play with except for their siblings. It was kind of sad. Many of the kids there, though grew up together. Their parents were siblings or close cousins. Over time, it seems that my cousins and I have drifted apart, and that's kind of sad. We might not have drifted apart, so much as we live different lives. I have kids and they don't. I follow my kids around to make sure that they don't fall from the ridiculous openings on the playground equipment 10 feet or more off the ground while they trust their kids are well with what they do. However, after the end of the day, I know that I still love my cousins and we still have a bond that is special and unique. What's the saying? A cousin is your first friend? Other than your siblings it's absolutely true.
I'm not worried about my children, though. My sister has two kids. They are younger than mine, but once they get older, they are going to be best friends. They even have a cousin on my husband's side of the family that is their age, now. When they get together, they are going to have so much fun. They are going to experience the same bond that I got to experience with my cousins. Next year and the year after, my kids will be paired off and that is exciting.
Unfortunately, not everyone gets to experience this bond. They don't always know what they are missing until they experience it first hand. My husband is visiting family that he hasn't seen for probably more than 20 years because of the distance between them. I hope that when he sees them again, that things will click. It might be awkward at first, but I hope that things just fall into place. When you're with family, you should feel cared about. You get to see history and resemblances- likeness. I hope that he feels this.
There is a pull, when you are with good family. When you look around, you feel like you're home, like you belong. You should feel that no matter what, they have your back. Each family has their quirks, but your family makes it work. You can have crazy uncle Ed, but he's your crazy uncle Ed. He may embarrass you, but he embarrasses everyone and hey, they are related to him too. You may have sweet, caring, pushover Aunt Mavis, but you and everyone love her so you stay kind and don't take advantage of her. Then, always in the bunch, there is cousin Edwin, Uncle Ed's son who is always getting themselves in a mess. You don't condone it, but you have his back when he needs it. You do this because you are family and family doesn't leave family behind. (I think that's from Lilo and Stitch)
Do you have special family events? What do you do with your family?
Cousins, siblings, and friends!
I've recently reconnected with some of my childhood cousin/friends, and I am so glad we're spending time together again.
ReplyDeleteThat's awesome!
ReplyDeleteWe used to have so much fun!!
ReplyDeleteWe still do, but fun happens after the kid's bed time. Haha.
ReplyDelete