The other day I asked my husband and in-laws what I should blog about for my next post. After writing about my oldest a few times from having ADHD to not wanting me anymore, I decided to write about my daughter, the middle child. My husband said, "What if you write about her eye surgery or about what it's like being the only girl in the midst of two brothers?" I decided that for this one, I would write about her being a girl in a boys world or just being the middle child. To do this, I interviewed her.
The Interview
I wanted to start off with easy questions and this is how it went.
M: What’s your favorite food?
K: Ice cream and cupcakes
M: What’s your favorite color?
K: Pink, red, purple- I can’t help it with those colors
M: What do you want to be when you grow up?
K: A mommy
These were pretty standard questions, ones I knew the answers to. By this time, she has moved to the other side of the table and is playing with her Barbie laptop with a musical keyboard. She seems happy to be answering the questions, but also a little bored. I started asking some more difficult questions and she gave me answers that I sometimes knew but also changed from time to time.
M: How old will you be when you get married?
K: I don’t know. 19? Is that a good age? M: Will you marry your high school sweetheart? K: I don't know. M: I was 21 when I got married, that's two years older than what you said. K: Ok
M: How many kids do you want?
K: I want 10. Five boys and five girls.
What it's like being the only girl child
OK, so I'm going to be the grandma of at least ten grandchildren. This isn't including the kids that my sons will have someday. My husband and I are going to have to really build up our retirement fund so we can live comfortably in our old age after spoiling all of our grandkids.
After this, I started asking her questions that were going to be emotional. I had a box of tissues ready for any emotional outbursts of crying. I hoped we wouldn't need them.
M: What’s it like being the only girl in the family?
K: I don’t like that I don’t have a sister. I’d like to have a
sister so we can torture my brothers.
M: How do you feel about being the middle child? (I held my breath, expecting to hear about the injustice of it.)
K: I feel good about being a middle child.
K: I feel good about being a middle child.
I tried to bait her some more. Her responses weren't what I expected. After all, my middle sister was an emotional fountain, I expected something similar.
M: What do you think of your older brother?
K: think he’s the best brother ever!
M: What do you think of your younger brother?
K: I don’t know, yet. I know that he drives me crazy every.
Single. Day.
M: But you guys like to play together, right?
K: I like to dress him up like a girl because he doesn’t drive
me crazy, then. He plays nicely. Otherwise, he gives me a headache with
everything he does.
I knew that it was true. The other day, it had been quiet. I brought up a load of folded laundry for the kids to help put away and I called to K. Suddenly, I heard loud whispers and scurrying around. I looked inside K's room and found it empty, but I could see the light from the closet coming out from under the door. I opened it up, and there stood K in a pretty Princess Sofia dress and her little brother in one of her dresses that had a black velvet torso with a black, blue, and gray striped skirt. He reminded me of the part in The Little Rascals when Alfalfa and Spanky dressed in leotards at a ballet recital to hide from the bullies. I had to muffle my laughter.
Bring on the difficult questions
At this point, K still hadn't reached the emotional state that I thought would happen when talking about being a middle child, so I continued with some questions that I thought would open her up.
M: Do you feel left out sometimes?
K: Yeah, only when I have no one to play with.
M: Why don’t you have anyone to play with?
K: I don’t know. Sometimes I don’t know why.
M: Does it make you sad?
K: No, because then I can play with you!
So, instead of my daughter feeling emotional and upset about the injustice of being a middle child and the only sister with two brothers, she had me tearing up. I took a moment to gather myself and finished her interview.
M: How old are you?
K: I am 6 yrs old.
M: Are you looking forward to 1st grade?
K: Uh huh! I think it will be fun. I hope I can go to Mr. B’s
class just like my big brother. I am glad to see my friends, except Isabella
when she doesn’t listen.
M: What is something you’d like to do today?
K: I want to play outside and maybe hang out with grandma for a
while and go to Old McDonalds had a farm (as she plays on her piano toy) what?
I thought it was funny!
Conclusion
So there you have it. I tried my best to prove that there is a Middle Child Syndrome that affects all middle children. I wanted to prove that maybe they felt mistreated or more frustrated because they were the middle child, but my middle child told me that she's actually pretty happy and likes her life. So, in conclusion: There is no such thing as middle child syndrome. There is, however, First Child Syndrome, which I have experienced first hand as the oldest child. Don't believe me, ask a first child what it was like growing up as one and I'm sure you'll get a huge list of why it sucked being the first child.
Are you a middle child? Did you have a syndrome? Tell me about it in the comments!
It does suck being the oldest.
ReplyDeleteI mean, we didn't get away with half the stuff our siblings did. My sisters got cellphones the same time that I did and I didn't get to drive where ever I wanted until I was in college. Rules that applied to me never applied to them. Sheesh!
DeleteAwww I love this! I was also the middle child to two brothers. I got a long better with my younger brother though. Her answers are so sweet and genuine and I love that she's looking forward to 1st grade. I do hope my daughter will feel the same way when she starts school. Thanks for interviewing your beautiful, awesome middle child! =)
ReplyDeleteShe likes to be more independent and do things on her own so it just drives her crazy that her little brother adores her.
DeleteI love this! Such a cute interview and a great blog post idea. Well done Mama!
ReplyDeleteThis is the cutest post. I loved all her replies. Lets see if she has 10 kids ; ) I was also laughing at her in the closet dressed up with her brother!
ReplyDeleteMy oldest used to tell us he'd have 20 kids. The number has dropped significantly. I'm very relieved since he told me I would have to babysit them all.
DeleteWhat a cute interview! Today is Middle Child Day!
ReplyDeleteI didn't know that! It would have been fitting to have released it today.
DeleteI stumbled upon this late, but I would like to say that in my experience middle child syndrome mainly applies to same gender siblings. Here, you have the oldest, the daughter, and the youngest. Her gender makes her stand out and allows her more attention from
ReplyDeletethe family. I am the middle of three girls. In my case, we have the oldest, another girl, and the youngest. People get excited about firsts and lasts. When the middle child is unique in an obvious way (ex. gender, disablity,...) it changes the family structure and the middle child gets more attention, thus eliminating middle child syndrome.
That's definitely something to consider. I'm the oldest of three girls and as the oldest, I got to see how relaxed my parents got with their parenting. I actually feel cheated by not being allowed to do things until I was older, while my sisters got to do things sooner. I feel bad for my youngest sister because she didn't get as many pictures taken of her and she probably had more responsibility thrust upon her because she was treated like she was the same age as my other sister and me, even though she was three years younger than me. My middle sister was just in instigator. haha.
DeleteYes and the fact that the daughter is only 7 yrs old. I started realizing it when I was 12, and it can be less physical but more mental. l broke down at night and in showers upset that my parents never acnoleged how I felt about things, so we got in fights ect.
DeleteI'm also a middle child, i'm the only girl of one older and younger brother. My older brother was always getting the first of everything, and my mom favored him cause she never wanted a girl in the first place. But when my little brother was born he grabbed my moms attention and the older brother got jealous and i became the babysitter and peace keeper. My family seemed to forget about me and all the little stuff i did for them. I've gotten use to it but it never lessens the feeling of loneliness. I'm was an(and still am) extreme introvert an geek all through out school. I read books so that i could escape my own reality. So yeah being a middle child sucks!
ReplyDeleteAwww! I'm so sorry that happened to you! A child should never have to go through that. I hope you had some good friends that helped you through it.
DeleteI can relate to the reading books, and being the peace maker. I am 2 yr age gap between my brothers. I can not believe how much you went through as a child. I don't know how it will end up for me, but it is EXTREAMILY hard to keep friends, the longest I have had was, idk maybe 3 yrs. now that Im 13 I feel more emotionally than physically rejected. but ya having friends helps (expecally 1s that are also middle childs). I have 2 really great friends, even though we may not be liked by the older middle school girls. one of them has depression and other VERY sarcastic.
DeleteI thought it was hilarious that your youngest dressed up in a dress. It reminds me of a time when my brother and cousin dressed in dresses at my grandma's house. I couldn't stop laughing! I'm also a middle child, and it just kind of depends how I feel about it. I feel pretty invisible and am given less sometimes, but I can work through it with all the good parts. I hope when I grow up I am a good parent to my middle child if I have one.
ReplyDeleteHe and his sister are such good buddies, right now, it wouldn't take much for her to convince him to do anything. He listens to her better than me, right now.
DeleteHi. I am also a middle child of 2 boys. I have middle child syndrome. I have been lying to myself and only realized I had it a month ago when I was 12. My brothers get away with every thing! my younger brother will complain until my mom finally gives in. Both my brothers were able to play a game 2 years before me! My parents never under stand how I am feeling.
ReplyDelete